Saturday, January 31, 2009

Woody Allen Moments

There are times I over think things. If I don't hear from my kids (who are all 20+ year olds) after I have tried to contact them within 24 hours, I will obsessively think:
1. They must be dead, kidnapped, or involved in a car accident.

2.They must have been thrown in jail for some crazy reason and not allowed that one phone call.

3. They must have left the country (maybe so they wouldn't be thrown in jail?!)

I have NO idea why these thoughts enter, nurture, and then begin to grow like bamboo in my brain...but they do. I think it's for the basic reason of --well, if they're not dead--even a broken arm, flat tire, fill-in-the-blank, is SO much better of a reason for not calling. I know. Weird, sick, and bizarro.

Lately, I have been having issues with social skills at the grocery store. Case in point:

We live in a relatively small town (approximately 30,000 in our immediate area) and chances are good that you may run into someone you know at the grocery store...and usually that someone is someone that you haven't seen for awhile --where a simple wave of the hand is not going to do it.

You ask how things are, you let them know your life in five minutes, and then inevitably one of us ends up saying "it's so good to see you again! let's talk soon!" and you think your conversation is finished.

The problem end up "running" into that person in some other aisle during the shopping trip. AWKWARD. smile. diverted eyes. weird banter.

It happens enough to me that now I state "well, I'm sure we'll run into each other before we check out....but so good to see you" and try to avoid them by checking out their grocery cart in an act of desperation to memorize if they had milk, yogurt, or cheese--and if so--I'll be safely shopping in the dairy aisle for a few minutes while they're in the produce department. And don't even get me started if we could end up in the same checkout lane. My cart and I must look like a video game from a bird's eye view.

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