Friday, February 29, 2008

MSNBC--your website for breaking news

I kid you not. This is what MSNBC had on its homepage:
Top stories as of 9:16 p.m. Fri., Feb. 29, 2008

Are you kidding me? Bowling is headline news. Who knew? When I was growing up in the Midwest I remember that my mother would have a bowling league every Wednesday morning. I seem to recall that she had her own bag and ball. Yep, she did. I can't remember if there were matching shirts...
I have always held tight to the idea that I was adopted into my family to make it look like I was #2 of a twin set....there was much planning to pull this off. I have visions that I was given to my adopted family from the mob boss's pregnant teenage daughter so that no one would ever know that Lucky's daughter was knocked up during fall break of 1958.
Bowling? It has to be an inborn trait...I just don't have it.

Monday, February 25, 2008

Once a year

I knew where this was going and I wasn't disappointed...hysterical!

Thursday, February 21, 2008

Reality Bites

I have officially lost my perspective on good television. Tonight, I am ecstatic that along with the results of American Idol (I know...I know...I'm such a loser. But, I don't vote...usually...and if I'm balking at the show and admitting that I watch...that's part of the treatment plan, isn't it?) I also will have my fill of Survivor Fans vs. Favorites. And if that were not enough...I'm going to close the night with a good bite of Celebrity Apprentice.

The sad thing is...I am so HAPPY that I have something to watch on television!!!

But if I didn't have anything broadcast for the masses...I have backup. Don't even get me started that my Disc 6 of Season 3 "24" has just arrived and I get to find out if Jack Bauer can save Los Angeles from this deadly virus that's going to be spread around in the next hour or so...

Sunday, February 17, 2008

A Day in The Life

Here is my day in short form:
Woke up, got out of bed, dragged a comb across my head. Found my way downstairs and drank a cup, and looking up, I noticed I was late....Found my coat and grabbed my hat, made the bus in seconds flat-
oops...the Beatles classic came to mind. What am I talking about...I don't even take the bus...does our town have a bus??
But I digress...
I work with children; yes, I see those little people who are petri dishes of bacteria everyday in my classroom.
I am the one in the family who 9/10 of the time will go to the grocery store...almost as germ ridden as the kids at school (for the moms and dads out there...EVERY child has buckets of bacteria ...I'm not just saying it's only the kids I, the amount of LYSOL wipes I go through after those kids leave...they're probably cleaner after they leave just by touching my tables)
And, to spin the viral merry go round a little faster--I also go to a health club to work out twice a week....which is probably worse than schools and the grocery store.
So, I knew it had to happen. I am ill. A bronchial, coughing, achy sort of a sickness but I am sure to survive. I either sound like a sultry Kathleen Turner (when she was hot in Body Heat) or a life long smoker. To all the healthy ones out there...keep it your life...wash your hands.

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Because I said so!

So, I've been in a dilemna with my hair. The "Posh Spice" bob looked amazing on my head and I must say I received more than enough compliments on it...c'est la vie. I've done it for about a year now and I'm thinking it's time to move on. Why can't I be like Anna Wintour and wear the classic bob with bangs for a hundred million years and be happy with it? Be KNOWN for that cut?

In reality I'm thinking I'm not that pulled hair always smooth and shiny (I know...sounds conceited but it's really the one thing on my body that I can say loud and proud that I don't have a problem with), people stopping and asking where I got the cut, how great it looks. As I'm writing this I'm wondering why I don't pick up the phone and make an appointment with my main man hairdresser Roscoe?

I think I'm becoming more Sarah Jessica Parker and would like to have the head of curls every once in awhile (yep, got that great curl thing going on too--but I just straighten it and no need to wash for four days--amazing--I know, I know, if only they could clone it) So, anyway, for the moment I'm going to let it grow out and enjoy some spring/summer curls and straighten it when I want as well.

But, in order to do the curls, I feel like I need the blonde. I've been Posh Spice on concert...a brunette. A brunette that needs to have her hair colored every three weeks to cover a regrowth of gray...hence, the next plan of attack for the hair. Highlights.

So, I get the highlights and they look like the sun kissed my head. It's all good until a certain fourth grade boy I teach comes into the classroom.

"Did you do something to your hair?" he asks.

"Yep, I did. It's to help with the gray (I don't bore him with the details...the SJP connection, etc...he's a guy, and even at this age won't be interested) what do you think?"

"Um...I think it looks like you have gray hair now" he states.

I begin to argue, "but, this isn't gray...these are blonde highlights. They make my hair sort of fun, don't you think?"

"Nope" he says, "I like it when it was dark."
Of course, this coming from a ten year old boy with a headful of dark curls and a mother who overdyes her hair this hideous auburn...oh, nevermind. I can't argue and win with this kid. But if I could I would slap down these photos and tell him to "tell them that they look like they have gray hair...yeah, what about that, yeah...seee..."I told you so.